How Mom’s With No Extra Time Can Make New Friends
As you’re well aware, Motherhood has many stages. The early years can feel like you're drowning in the ocean, barely keeping your head above water. Then those same babies finally go to school, and they start trying different activities, leaving your evenings full of lessons and practices.
You may finally be sleeping through the night…. but now it seems as if every hour is chock full of shuttling kids around, keeping the household afloat, and not to mention work.
You would love to have a few more friends to join you alongside this rollercoaster called motherhood..who understand the same challenges you’re facing and share in the joy as well. But where do you find time to meet these women and how would you even begin?
In my journey to find more Mom friends, these 7 ideas helped make it so much easier:
1. Meet People at Places You Already go-
Don't make your life more complicated by adding new places you have to go- start looking for friends in places where you already are going.
At the gym say hi to the woman on the treadmill next to you.
In line at the grocery store you see a woman behind you with kids close in age to yours, use that as a conversation starter.
People on the PTA board, bank tellers, library employees. New opportunities for friendship are everywhere if you just start looking.
If your kids are older, make an effort to get to know their teammates' parents' names. If you're waiting in line to pick your kid up from violin lessons, say hello to the parents beside you in line. If a committee is being formed, put yourself out there and join.
2- See Every Encounter as One Step Closer to a New Relationship-
Making new Mom friends can seem scary, you’re not alone, it was for me too. Especially when for many years the people you spent the most time with, were in diapers. But a slight mindset shift can make finding friends less intimidating and the process so much easier!
Start by looking at each interaction with another adult as a baby step to a new friendship.
Shift your mindset that if you're willing to be a little uncomfortable and put yourself out there, then the right people will be put in your path. I'm telling you this tiny change had me looking at so many more opportunities to make new friends. It also felt less forced and more relaxed. You have enough on your plate and looking for new friends shouldn’t add any stress to your life.
3- Ask People That You Already Know-
What about your neighbor who has a daughter your age? Maybe next time she comes over for a playdate you could invite her in to visit while the kids play in the backyard. Use people that are already in your life as a link to new relationships. Who do they know that they think would get along with you?
Maybe your favorite barista has a sister that she thinks would hit it off with you. How about your coworker's cousin who loves books as much as you do? Use the people who are in your life as a stepping stone to new relationships, especially those that know you well. That way you're even more likely to get along with those they introduce you to.
4- Invite a Friend to Join You on Your Next Outing-
Carving out time is tricky so use things you're already doing like walks, going to the park, or storytelling at the library, as ways to invite new people along. And always encourage them to bring other moms along, the more the merrier. And this gives you even more chances to meet new people.
Use a good friend or even just an acquaintance, as a way to connect more with others. Everyone wants to be included and by being the one who asks, your circle of friendship will definitely start to grow.
5- Rekindle Old Relationships-
You may have lost touch with many friends in the baby to toddler years, so why not try to rekindle old friendships that you already have.
Maybe the friends you seek are not new people- just people you've fallen out of touch with.
If you moved and lost touch with someone, reach out to see how they are. You never know how an old path crossed, could come back to life.
6-Wish People Happy Birthday-
Every day on Instagram or Facebook you see that someone is having a birthday. A little happy birthday text can go a long way to fostering a new friendship, nurturing one that's withering, or bringing one back to life that's gone completely dormant.
Or use apps that automatically remind you of friends' birthdays. This way you're not having to keep track of one more thing.
7-The Golden Rule-
You know it well, you’re often reminding your kids of it-
Treat others as you would want to be treated.
If an idea pops into your head that seems like something you would like- do that for a friend. Send a nice text, give a compliment, get an extra drink to drop off to them from Starbucks. A little kindness goes a long way
Know you're not alone in wanting to have more Mom friends in your life- try a few of these ideas soon and you'll have enough friends to go on a girls’ trip before you know it.
